14 / 04 / 2013 - Sunday
3:30 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Today is the day before Bengali New
Year. I got a good long needed holiday but I don't know why, now as it’s about
to end, I am feeling like I haven't use it properly. I have already made some
plans and schedules all went into vein. All the lists I have made stayed full. Ya
something happened. Not very terrible but it’s a closure to a chapter. Now I will
be finding some new chapters to read. The ending of previous chapter maybe not
very pleasant and satisfying but the next one could be different. But this is
not the only cause of me being unable to use the long time. I have planned so
much of study and yet I am doing nothing. All my time goes into doing
assignments. Assignments are the biggest menace of student life. It deletes all
the happiness and fun from the life. On top of that, our beloved teachers are
putting more pressure in class and through extra projects, assignments, and now
at the end of the semester, the surprise tests. And this poor fellow over here
is doing 2 master’s degree courses at once. Therefore, it means 11 subjects for
me to study, 3 laboratory, 9 assignments, and 15 exams all in next 2 months.
One thing I have knew is that to
be an eligible bachelor male in India you have to have so many qualities. Don’t
know why I feel that it’s the same as Bollywood, it’s tougher than Hollywood. Just
like that, India is much tougher and competitive for males than in western
countries. Just like a Bollywood star, you got to have many things in you. You are
not only expected to be tall dark & handsome but wealthy as well. You have
to have looks to kill, Good physique, Deep pockets, 7 or 6 digit of stable bank
balance. Bike, car, home, stable job, government job is more desirable. Then only
you can think of having a girl for a stable and proper relation. Without that,
girls will come into your life just to make you more miserable and break away
your heart. In a short, it will be a time pass for them. As they will be
looking for a BETTER person which clearly you are NOT. And when they or their family gets one for
them you will be better as dead to them.
Day by day, I am feeling incompetent.
Slowly I am feeling like I am losing my edge. I am in a deep competition in my
life. From every aspect, mostly from my studies. I feel like shit sometimes. A complete
fool. I am challenged in almost every part of my life and the coming days are
expected to level up this competition of mine I am deep into already. My leadership
gets questioned all the time. Its ok for me now. As I know that I am right all
the time and I they will get the answer one day or another.
The internet connection I use,
PMPL, I think I have to cut the connection as they stopped supporting torrent
in their wireless plan. And as they say, wired connection to my home is not
possible at this moment so I have no other option but to cut it. Because I need
serious support of torrent. The money I am paying for internet is all about
getting movies and games from the net. And I can’t live without movies. This is
an integral part of my life.
The 5-year question answer book,
the organiser, which is an essential part of any WBUT student’s study package,
has not been out yet. It should be by the time now. As we are having exams in
few days. We will not be getting time to practise all those sets. I don’t know
how they use it but I use that book for getting questions and points to write a
good answer from book.
I have made some new friends,
some in class, some in Facebook from there some came into my life. But I feel
that in the end they will all leave me to some point of my life. It’s not the
fear of loosing friends, as it’s gone now. I am used to of losing friend and being
backstabbed but it’s my prediction which day by day is proving itself right.
And the funny omen I have from
the very beginning of my social consciousness. Friendship with any English medium
person, specially girls, always prove inconsistent for me. I don’t know why, no
matter how much I try, we don’t stay as friends. With Bengali medium persons, we
stay in friendship much longer. I haven’t found any proper & proven answer
for that but I think it’s a mentality mismatch problem. Maybe its totally my
problem. Or maybe it theirs. But the thing is their over the head attitude
always pisses me off.
Anyways enough said for today. Will
continue again. Enjoy the Bengali New Year with lots of foods, guests and
clothes. Best wishes.
Bye
