My Digitized Thoughts - Ramen Mukherjee ...

Hii guys,

Here is again me. After “bom sabado” attack writing into my blog once again. Though the whole week is lot more frustrating, heart breaking, insulting ,tiresome ,busy ,tough ,poorly-lived week. But still there is something in this week. This whole week made me a little strong and more negative than ever. I am now clearer to my goals. I now know who are not with me. Well there is particularly no one with me so I don’t have to mention it.

First things first. I told many times and again I am saying that ,I do blog not to please any people. I do blog to please me.so people judging my point of view, please raise your standards.

I chatted a lot with my best friend Saumya personally. He told me his internal views about me in person. We were in the outdoor stadium of ground. Its name is Polo ground. It’s an old ground. I heard that British people used to play polo here and later the NCC acquired the place for their daily routines. Then it is opened for people. And now we are chatting in the top step on that place. The place looked good. Felt good, warm & soothing. I told him everything, told him about all my problems. All the hurdles I am facing right now. Inside out I am torn apart.

Today I heard a bad news.one of my closest friend had breakup. Well I shouldn’t tell his name publicly. His girlfriend is getting engaged to another man. And that’s heart breaking. I felt immense sorry for him. It remembered my old times. I also had felt that. Well many times. And I still feel for that girl I think. Well what I think I don’t know. Because its mixture of many emotions. But the bottom line is I still feel. And that is making my life hell. Only four or five days ago he came to me and told happily that he is committed recently and now. My only question to that girl is that if you can’t fight for your love, you shouldn’t do the love. If she is unable to hold the love she must have not get committed with my friend. Well my friend is hiding his tears. I know he is. He should be. Because world is a very bad place. People hurt where the wound is.

I am studying hard these days but I as I felt before, I know very little about the subject and I have to learn more. I restricted my social activity much. Now I just come online twice or thrice in whole day. Mainly to wish them birthdays. I am in need of several things. But as my friend told me it’s good to be satisfied in what you have. I am trying to be satisfied by what I have but the problem, what I told him also is that I DON’T HAVE ANY THING. But he said that I still have my life & soul. Well in this materialistic world, where everyone is running from one goal to another how can I be satisfied by what losts its value in today’s world? The answer is yet to find that what I have, but it is very certain that I need several things and that things are quite a necessity to me.

My parents, my family don’t support me. They only see me as a tool, as an investment for future. Hardcore materialistic, isn’t it? Then why wouldn’t I be like that? Because it is said that if you are in Rome then you should dress like a roman. No matter whats your inside is always show the people what they want to see or what they DESERVE to see.

Hmmm… there are many things to say. But not today. Some another time. Not really feeling chatty right now.so…

Bye bye