12/10/2013 – Maha Ostomi – Saturday
11:38 AM Edit This 0 Comments »
Last night we roamed many places
of the city and out of it and some of the very odd places too. Though the pandals
are ordinary, the idols are also very normal, nothing special about them but
the only special thing was the madness they have by their surrounding people. They
are too excited. That kind of positivity we need. On my way of becoming an
optimist, I am trying to watch about the +ve things of everything from a
different perspective. They say there is positivity and negativity in everything
like yin and yang. They stay embossed in each other but it’s up to us, the
humans the look for the thing we really want to see because we only see what we
want to see. Our vision is a biased one and it gets activated as soon as we
learn to see things and start to feed out consciousness with data.
Gave anjalai now. But am I blessed
enough to count on this throughout the year full of good blessing? Living alone
now because everyone is busy. Everyone is doing something with someone and I will
see the results at the end but right now they are busy and they have no time
for me. They will only find me when they will need me. I know that, it happens every
time. No one cares about me. The question is why would people care about me? Who
am I? Nothing but just an ordinary person.
In the pandal I saw many people
making queue to get ready for the Anjali, some people I know, some I may know
and some I don’t. But no one looked at me a like I am invisible. This invisibility
is a bliss at sometimes, I do agree to it. But as a human we thrive to get
highlight of at least a person. It’s like out rejuvenation source. We get
rejuvenated every time we get some priority. It’s like a painkiller for every
reason. We find our reason of being through it. And a priority less life is a
shit. And this priority has many names, faith trust love are some kind of name
given to it. And it does changes form to one to another. It’s like a power, an
energy. Changes form, creates form but never degrades.
Personally I don’t like pandal
hopping, it’s tiresome. I don’t like the crowd either, too much of cacophony. I
don’t have friends, team or groups so I don’t like to get out because I don’t like
to roam alone. And also I am not comfortable with loud music and sound. Sound is
ok in my headphone only. I feel restless. Maybe I like my darkness, it’s cool
and I can stay calm. Mental illness? You can say or it’s a state of mind and
more advance cool mind. I feel good when I at the home still I don’t like my
home. The environment is bad and the Vaastu is totally opposite of what needs
to be COMPATIBLE.
Whenever I think of getting married,
I think more than I forget and lastly I reach to the conclusion that I am not
ready and I too don’t know when I will get ready to feed another person of my
own. I am still feeding on my father’s money. I realised one thing that people
dress up and make style and fashion statements just to get the attention of opposite
sex. The world is moving around this theory and we don’t even realise it. We study
to get a good job. Good job gets us good money. Good money gets us good
partner. Good partner gives us good sex and finally we get a good family of our
own. It’s always about having a good partner. From the dawn of humankind. We always
did things which attracts the other sex. Boys used to rode horse, now bike. They
used to fight and become macho man and unfortunately they do this even now. They
used to style with open body and now girls are following that. So it’s always
about getting in the lime light of another sex. No matter it’s the ONE or it’s
for everyone. We always do something different to be on the spotlight. That is
however really amazing.
And in this corner I don’t know
how to dress, how to do style, I look not so good and definitely I am not
handsome. I have a personality which only few people appreciates. And everything
about me is completely opposite of what my opposite sex needs, hunk, handsome,
rich, high degree, good job, deep pocket, cute face, spineless… I am not like
this. By the nature I am like a man of 60 years of age. And I look like a 35
years of a person. People of my original age keep a distance from me thinking
that I am not one of them. To the elders I am definitely a child, so they keep
a distance from me and the kids call me uncle and now a days I really enjoy
this. At least someone is showing some respect, one way or another I am getting
it.
Finally I learned that no matter
what you do, you fate will drive you, so you just have to get rich or die trying..
eeh ?
0 comments:
Post a Comment